Macabre...ish Horror Review: Siren

 

Remember when I said many of the stories in the V/H/S movies could be movies on there own? Well here you go! Siren is exactly that. Let’s set the stage, a week before Jonah’s wedding, he and his groomsmen are treating him to his last nights’ of debauchery as a single man. It goes bad for them after they’re invited to an underground club, located in a mansion, called 50 North, 40 West. Some very strange things are happening with this club and makes them uneasy. 

 

Soon after getting there and having a personal experience with a singing ‘dancer’, Jonah frees her from behind a locked door and believing a captive has been rescued, he quickly realizes he’s made a terrible mistake. There’s some crazy otherworldly stuff happening here,  this woman is some kind of monster and she wants him! 

 

Jonah and his buddies find themselves running and in the fight for their lives as she hunts them down. They should be scared because she’s a man eating, mutilating, killer. Oh and the guys are also being hunted by the ‘club owners’/creature captors, which is its own kind of terrible, they want to punish the guys and recapture the Siren, she is after all, the club’s main attraction. 

 

This movie is a horror comedy, though more horror than comedy. There are some wacky people in this movie (a weird, supernatural creature catcher with a crazy voice, a terrible stripper wearing flip flops!) and also some interesting characters (a woman who’s got the same ‘hair’ as Medusa). The movie is bloody, gory, graphic (Siren tears a man’s sexual organs clean off) and torture. There’s kidnapping, plenty of nudity and graphic sexual scenes. Also a sexual assault warning, Jonah is kidnapped and assaulted by the Siren. Seriously, you’ve been warned. 

 

Finally, somehow Jonah does get married after all of this and with most of his friends dead, tries to move on but the Siren finds him again...

 

The movie is one hour, twenty three minutes long and releases in 2016. Enjoy, horror fiends!

 

 

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