To Podcast or Not to Podcast? That is the Question.

Every once in a while people ask me if they should start a podcast and I thought I was helping by telling them no but since some people think I’m being a hater. Then I’m not telling y’all no anymore…So yeah, do it!

 

And this is all it takes…”Hold on to your butts!” (In Samuel L. Jackson’s voice)

 

So, I’m sure you already have a catchy name and are just bursting with ideas. You probably already signed up for a platform and everything. Perfect. You will need a logo/artwork at some point but not necessarily, first thing.

(Note: Just as an aside, if you don’t know how to do the art and logo yourself, you’ll have to find and pay someone to do it. If you go the AI route, just know that choice will cost you potential listeners before you even get started.)

Have you decided your format? You’ll need one because people don’t like stream of consciousness rambling or when you just talk to yourself or just ‘to the audience’.

Are you gonna have a co-host? Guests? Because if you want guests, you have to find them and they need a reason to talk to you. Do you know and are a fan of their work? What’s your pitch gonna be to get them to agree to come on your podcast? What are y’all gonna talk about?

Hold on…before we get too far ahead of ourselves here. You have to decide who you want to have on and why? You need to research them and their work. (No one wants to find out you know nothing about them or their work until they arrive for the big day.)

Alright, you’ve decided and did your research, great! Now you have to reach out to them. How are you gonna do that? You gonna just tag them on social media? DM? Contact their manager?? Send emails to their team??? Will you join a network? How ever that happens, then you have to wait and see if you even get a reply.

If you get a reply and it’s a yes, congratulations! Welcome to your next steps… Will this be audio or video? Do you have everything you need to make this happen? You need to figure out a date that works for everyone? You also need to have some good questions and topics in mind. How are gonna play this? Straight? Humorous?? Are you good at talking to people? Are you personable? Are you a good active listener? Do you have back up plans in case something fails?

 

And all of that is just the beginning…

 

Before you record, whether it’s just audio or video, do you have all the equipment you need? Of the right quality? Back ups just in case a mic or camera fails during the recording?? Are you recording with more than one method, just in case one fails or the quality isn’t great? Do you have a back up power source, just in case??

In my 6 years of doing this I’ve had a software fail in the middle of an episode with two guests and I had to messaged my cohosts and they continued on without me (That was the episode with Todd Jenkins & Billy Blair director and actor of Cherokee Creek btw). I’ve also gotten the blue screen of death on my desktop, a couple of hours before a scheduled episode, a power and internet outage on the day of an episode (That’s the one with Adam Deyoe, director of Decade of the Dead). And then from time to time, neither of my cohosts could make it, for whatever reason.

And I never cancel, I don’t cancel. We’re doing this!!

You must be prepared for anything if you have guests and be ready to maneuver. Don’t assume they’ll clear their schedule for you again. They’re gifting you their time, act like it.

Once you make it through recording, you need to edit. And boy howdy, editing is its own struggle. It could take, easily, twelve hours to edit one episode. Gotta cut out coughing, sneezing, dead air, side bar conversation, background noise, reverb etc. And it is exhausting. After all that work, you still may not be satisfied with the outcome. If you don’t know how to edit or use all the tools you need. Time to learn because you could pay someone but it’s prohibitively expensive.

And remember, no one’s getting paid, if anything, you’re the one paying. Even if only for equipment, platform and tool subscriptions. The upfront costs can be as little or as much as you want. In the end, you are doing this for the love of the game, baby!

After the episode is done, do you have an intro and exit (outro)? Will there be commercials or ads? How many? Remember, high quality content is king, don’t chase off your potential listeners with boring nonsense or ads every 10 minutes. And once again, if you do not know how to do this yourself, you’ll have to find and pay someone to do it.

So, cool, time for the upload to the platforms. This is great!!

 

But wait, there’s more…

 

You still need an audience and none of the platforms are just gonna give you one. They’re content to let you upload everyday to a barren, traffic-less platform. They don’t care.

So you also need to have the ability to drum up interest. So you’ll need a website, an active blog and social media. And you’re gonna need to run those numbers up. Because no matter how much traffic you get, only a fraction of those people are gonna be interested in your podcast.

And that only works out if you have viral posts on the topic of your podcast. Rage baiting doesn’t get downloads unless maybe you have a gossip podcast. Getting 100,000 views on a post is great but none of them will click the link to your podcast if it’s unrelated to the topic and/or if you’re boring.

Sorry to be the bearer of bad news. And not just that, social media platforms absolutely hate it when you try to ‘sell’ anything without paying them. And they hate it when you post links so all those posts will get throttled and it might set your whole page and all previous efforts back. So not only do you need to be quick and witty to get prospective listeners attention and hope they click your link, you have to do it under the nose of the algorithm.

Of course, you could pay for ads but that still doesn’t mean people will click that link.

So on top of all the thankless work that podcasts require, you’ll also have to maintain a social media presence, at least. But it’s smart to also have a blog at a minimum. Social media is fickle and it takes very little to lose your account these days. Which means all that work and effort is gone.

Plus, I hate to be the one to tell you but don’t just rely on your guests to drum up interest, you will likely be disappointed. Remember, they did you a solid by being a guest, don’t expect more than that.

So after all of this work, it could net you nothing. Which is why more than 95% of podcasts fail before they even reach the 10th episode. It is demoralizing and embarrassing to do all that work for an audience of zero or maybe just your family and friends. With no way through and no idea what to do to change it. Especially when amongst the podcasting crowd ranges from celebrities to grifters to AI slop.

It’s rough and if you can make it work, it can be unbelievably rewarding. I don’t do this to make content, I do it to interact with and build community and the art. The center of it all, is always the art (film) and the people who make it. And it’s not over after the episode goes live. I keep in touch with my guests, support their work going forward and I get a deeper interest and understanding of the entire industry.

All while having a life and a full time job.

But I understand if you quit before 10 episodes.  Because remember, when you asked if you should do it and I said “no”? Well, now you know why.

And I’d simply suggest building some rapport and trying to be a guest on podcasts instead. You won’t have much, if any, creative control over the end result but you will also not have all of the work of the podcaster. Vet the ones that you’re interested in, do your research, listen to their work and only do the ones that align with your brand and/or ethics.

Anyways, if you actually read all of that (Why?? J/k), thanks for reading and I hope you gained some incite, whatever you decide to do. I’m sorry to inform you that I have no grift or course to sell. But I do have a podcast. Listen if you like (or don’t…whatever). It is called Macabre…ish Cults, Classics & Horrors and here’s a link to it and all the other stuff. https://linktr.ee/macabre_ish